Ich Vermisse Dich
by VitalRegionsSeizer
Summary: Ever since Prussia died Ludwig hasn't been taking it so well, and turns to a bad decision.  WARNING: OOC-ness, depressing stuffs, hints at suicide. TITLE: I Miss You in German.


It's all my fault. It's my fault he's gone. His screams still echo in my head, the way he yelled for my name. The first time he actually used my proper name. I've never been the same since that day, when I found his body, covered in blood, bruises and cuts. He managed to say one last thing to me. Four words that felt like daggers in my heart.

"Ich liebe dich, bruder." His eyes closed softly, and his spirit left his limb body in my arms. Tears run down my face and fall onto his head as I hug his corpse tightly, almost crushing it.

"Ve~ Doitsu!" Italy's voice brought me out of my thoughts. I'd forgotten that I was at a meeting. "A-Are you alright?"

"Ja Italy, just day dreaming."

"O-Ok, well me and Japan are going to grab some pasta. Do you want to come with us?" His eyes stared at me like a hungry puppy would look at it's owner. I shook my head.

"Nein, I got things to do. I'm sorry." I got up from my chair, nodded and began to walk out the door. I could hear the saddness in Italy's voice.

"Oh, alright then. Ciao..." Before he could finish his sentence I had left the room, leaving him alone.

"Bruder!" I heard his voice. The voice I craved to hear. "Yo West, get up!" I opened my eyes to see his bright red ones.

"What is it Gilbert?" I sat up to find myself on the couch, I wonder how I got here.

"Come play! The awesome me is bored~!" He whined loudly, pulling me from the couch. Usually I wasn't able to play with him because I always had work. But for some reason I felt as though I didn't have anything else in the world but him.

"Ok ok, I will. But Gil, I thought..." He interupted me.

"I am!" Two words which made my heart stop. How did he know what I was going to say? How was he even here, talking to me?

"B-but...how-" My words were stopped by a hug. My body was frozen, he felt like ice. "Bruder?"

Suddenly, my eyes jolted open. All I could see was darkness when I sat up. Damn it, it was a dream. I've been having alot like that lately. The only time I was happy was when I was a sleep. Just seeing his face was the best thing in the world. I clicked the lamp on that was sitting on my bed side table and picked up a picture frame that lay infront of it. I could feel knots form in my stomach, my heart breaking in half, my head beginning to hurt and tears forming in my eyes, just from looking at this one picture. The good old days. It was a picture of me and Prussia when we were kids. I was actually smiling back then and so was he, but he was always the man to have a smile on his face, even in the darkest of times. Tears fall onto the picture before I hug it to my chest.

"I can't take it anymore!" I sobbed and looked at the picture again. "The only time I'm happy is in my dreams, with you." I stroked Gilberts face with my finger. I never thought I was the kind of person to even think about doing something like this, but I couldn't take the pain anymore. I opened the drawers searching frantically for it. Slamming the drawers shut and throwing papers out of them. I just want to see him again so much, but I never want him to leave. Then, I found it. Taking it out the drawers and staring at it. My breathing was heavy as I traced the trigger with my finger.

"Now I get to sleep forever, and be with you forever." Biting my bottom lip, I lifted the gun to my head. Letting more tears fall from my eyes.

"STOP!" A voice suddenly shouted. It couldn't be. I opened my eyes to see blood red ones staring back at me.

"G-Gilbert?"

"Don't do this, I know I'm awesome and all but this is not the right thing to do!" He was still as vain as ever.

"Then what am I suppose to do!" I screamed at him, dropping the gun on the bed.

"Fight it!"

"I can't!"

"Yes you can, this isn't the Germany I know. The Germany I know and raised is strong and great. Never the kind of person to turn to such a decision. If you do this now, you will never be able to fight your demons!" I was shocked at what was going on. Was I really seeing him or have I finally lost it. He seemed real enough. "You will leave so much behind and just think about your friends, the ones willing to stay by you through-out all this. Italia-chan and Honda have noticed you've changed and yet they are still with you. Don't do this to them." I listened carefully to what he was saying and dropped my head.

"I-I'm sorry bruder..." I suddenly felt ice cold arms around me. If this was a dream it would've ended by now, but it felt like we were standing there for hours. I finally let my emotions out and buried my face in his shoulder. "I don't want you to leave me again!"

"I won't West, I'll always be here, even when it doesn't feel like it."  
>"I'm so sorry I let this happen to you, it's all my fault."<br>"Hey, bruder, it wasn't. Everything has to come to an end sometime, I guess it was just my time. Don't ever put yourself down West." It felt as though time had stopped and we were the only two people it the world. But the arms unwrapped from around me. "Now get some sleep and lighten up abit will you! I'm always here, don't ever forget that!" He kissed my forehead and tucked me up into bed. Like I was a kid again. "Guten nacht bruder"

"Ich liebe dich" I whispered as I closed my eyes.

The next morning I was walking to the meeting, feeling happier than usual. Italy and Japan noticed this.

"Morning doitsu~!"

"Good morning Germany. You look happy."

"I am, I'm feeling much better than usual." I smiled lightly at them. The two looked at eachother.

"Why is that, veh~?"

"I just had a good conversation with someone, that's all"

"It's good to hear you're feeling better, Ludwig. Shall we get going?" Kiku motioned his hand to the meeting room.

"Yes, lets." I led the way with the other two following me. I smiled as I felt another, paler person walking next to me, grinning.

***le sigh* This idea has been in my head for ages now and it didn't turn out as well as I thought. Oh well, I enjoyed writing it, but I still think Luddy-kins was abit OOC. But other than that, I hope I did alright, it feels abit rushed and I'm not very good at writing depressed things.**

**Also, I've heard that some people don't like it when someone uses suicide in their stories so if I offened someone, I'm a very sorry.**

**Ok, I think that's all I have to say, thank for reading ^^**


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